We realize that police business is serious, but every once in a while there are entries in the local police log that make us chuckle. We thought we’d share them.
Tuesday, May 31, 12:19 p.m. Reading Police asked the Department of Public Works to remove unauthorized “Stop for Pedestrian” signs placed at the crosswalks near the intersections of Franklin Street and Pasture Road and Franklin Street and Van Norden Road. Police reported they did not know who placed the signs there.
This is quite possibly the most benign vandalism anyone has ever committed in the history of civilization, ever.
Sunday, May 29, 9:34 a.m. A Grey Stone Way resident complained that youths had been hanging around the area and stealing lawn items. She reported that she had chased youths off of her property the previous night.
Conjure this as a mental image. Can you see it? A homeowner, on the older side, bursts from a front while brandishing a broom and wearing a bathrobe. She yells: “get off of my lawn, you darn kids!” Meanwhile, a group of youths—lets say five of them—scramble from his yard. One has a plastic pig under his arm. Another is carrying one of those reflective stakes like a wizard’s scepter, and a third is trying to carry a the top of a bird bath.
Smash cut to the police station. An officer paces in front of the kids. One of them is soaked head to toe. They barely restrain their laughter.
It sounds like something straight out of a teen comedy. Am I wrong?
Wednesday, June 1, 12:13 a.m. An Enos Circle resident reported a possible bat in her bedroom. An officer determined that the bat was deceased.
She never did say the bat was alive. She just said it was possibly in her bedroom.